17 Dec People Don’t Care
People Don’t Care
“People don’t care how much you know about them – if – they know how much you care about them.” I don’t remember who actually said that, in order to attribute the quote – maybe Harvey MacKay, but at Tenacity, we believe this is largely true.
Haven’t you ever been flattered by someone you know, but maybe not terribly well, when they remember something about you that you find surprising? That’s happened to me more often than I’d like to admit, particularly if I have very little recollection of comparable details about them. Surely we had a conversation some time ago and shared this kind of personal information with one another – our kids, our work, our interests. But they remembered and I didn’t – or maybe I was just too self absorbed to have asked in the first place. That’s definitely possible too. Nonetheless, I’m really flattered because they’ve made me feel as though I’m important to them. It’s nice to feel valued. It’s really nice to make other people feel valued.
I can be better at doing this – so can you probably. I can supplement the natural interest and caring I already have about people by being intentional in noting some of the important details about their lives – things they’ve already shared with me. Actually, modern technology makes this pretty easy today – I can add short notes in my Address Book, a tool that that is always with me on my iPhone. The question is… am I a good enough listener to acquire it – disciplined enough to archive it – and caring enough to use it. I’d like to be. I’m working to be.
Today’s PC crowd and super cautious HR managers are going to tell you – “No – you can’t do that – you’re invading personal privacy space.” We’re calling BS on that one – you should too. You’ll be a better relationship manager by having better relationships. And, the quality of your relationships will be directly related to how much you know about one another – and how you use that to demonstrate that you value them. And, you know what? You’ll find that people are a lot more interesting and worth investing in than you might have thought – pretty much all of them. Two main reasons:
- Every man (and woman) is my superior in some way. (Actually, in my case, it’s usually lots and lots of ways.) (Not sure who said this one either – C.S. Lewis perhaps?) That’s not being humble – that’s being experienced. It gets proven to me a lot.
2. Everyone is created in the image of our Creator. He told us so – He created them all. If that fails to get my attention with every new person I meet – I’m gazing in the wrong direction – probably inward.
Our work and our relationships provide a daily opportunity for integrity. (Integrity is my second favorite word, by the way.) It means to me a constantly occurring opportunity to integrate what I do and how I act – with what I believe. Caring for people – and valuing each one of them – is a high calling that makes me not only a better businessperson – but also just a better person. I’m still a work in progress.
“All businesses are ultimately governed by the quality of the relationships between the people involved.” Billy Payne, Chairman, Atlanta Committee for the Olympic Games (1996)
Do you agree?